Recently I began watching the television talk show "The View" which airs mornings on ABC (I think but I'm not that even a network? I don't know) just in case you have a deep desire to watch it after you read this. Well I watch it almost everyday because I have no life and although I am I guess a devout follwer of the show I actually kind of hate it.

The four people on the show (not including Barabara Walters) kind of bug me. Just last week I was watching it (this was the Monday after Woodstock '99) and the young one (Lisa Ling) was talking about how she would have gone to Woodstock because she liked a lot of the bands, but she didn't want to be stuck in a crowd with a bunch of 13 year olds. Um....okay. I watched it on television and it didn't really seem like there were that many young kids there. If it was me I wouldn't really care if a bunch of young teenagers were there if I really loved the band and really wanted to see them because I would be there for the band not for the people. Sure she might just not like teenagers because we're all wild and unruly, but hey, maybe I don't like people in their late twenties who think that they are better than me because they are older than me and on television and automatically assume that I will try to poo on them or something just because I'm not as experienced in the ways of the world as they are.

I'm not a particularily big fan of the chick that sits across the table from her either (all four of them sit at a table as chat at the beginning of the show). She's in her mid forties (don't quote me on that because I'm an incredibly bad judge of age; if I worked in a liquor store I would sell alcohol to minors and card people in their 30's without a second thought) and she always comes out in some stupid disguise for some reason, to try to make a stronger point I guess. She ways things like she wouldn't care if her husband had a mistress as long as he told her and it was only one, which I know is bullshit just from the way she said it. She tries to be the most thought provoking one by constantly disagreeing with the other four, just to disagree (which I sometimes do too so I don't know why it pisses me off so much when she does it). I don't really like the way she always seems to agree with the most contraversial opinion on the subject being discussed.

Anyways I suppose this entire article is sort of petty for attacking a show which I am constantly drawn to every morning but so many things about the show and the stars of it bother me. One day they were discussing Monica Lewinsky (I know that's probably not spelled right, sorry Monica) and Calista Flockhart because Barbara Walters was sandwiched between them on some list of the most strangely desireable women or something and one of them out of nowhere said "It's funny how Barabara Walters is between two eating disorders," jumping to conclusions that both of them had eating disorders simply because one is skinny and one is well not skinny. It's nothing really, but it just pissed me off the way she said that not even knowing for sure if either one of them has an eating disorder.

I hate the way they often only read mail which attacks them and the things they say, like the people who say good things don't deserve their 20 seconds on telvision. Seriously they read hate letters and email that criticize them and announce the names of the people who wrote them attempting to publicly humiliate the author, like they are the only ones entitled to have an opinion. Why even bother? Why not just ignore the bad letters and all of that negative energy because it doesn't really mean anything anyway. I mean even if they hate the show, like me they are obviously watching anyway. No no no they must take the time to read the letters and say "Oh poor me! So many people out there hate me. Please love me and applaud when I say what an asshole this person is". It makes me ill. Yet, strangely my eyes remain riveted to the t.v. screen unable to look away even for a second.

Look, they say stupid things all the time that just make me think, WOW! Why am I even watching a show that is so stupid. I can't stop watching though because I still want to know what they all have to say. Help me! I can stop myself from intently watching every morning even though there are many better things to do. Maybe I secretly love hearing all of their opinions an little stories as stupid as I may think they are onthe surface. Maybe I secretly think it is the best show on television. Help!