Okay, so y'all non females out there might think, oh I don't know,
being female is easy, but it sure as hell is not. Is it harder than being a
guy? I don't know, I've never been a guy, (hey that's just
a piece of flab that hangs really low) but it isn't any fucken easier.
Okay let's start with the wonderful gift God has blessed all females
with, their period. Oh yes, how I love to bleed every month.
Now,i don't know about you, but pluging myself up with cotton
for a few days every month just makes me day. And when my monthly
visitor comes early, without and warning,
and you have this fucken big maroon spot on your ass for everyone to
stare at? I live for that. let me tell you,
life just wouldn't be the same without that. Oh nothing
feels better than when you're sitting in
calss and you can feel your little monthly visitor dripping
down your leg and soaking up your pants.
And cramps? What can I say about cramps except, I love them
Who can live without them (GUYS).
Doubled over in pain, not able to move, everyone
should get to experience this. And then PMS, rocks the world.
Whew! Excess bitchiness, love it. Everyone around me loves it. But hey,
we're all living in denial of our pmsness anyways. "What the hell do you
mean I'm bitchy? Well fuck off".
P.S. Why do assertive girls get labelled bitches? What's an assertive guy
called? Cool. Now, why does every guy think that
just because a female is opinionated and stands up for
herself, it must be pms? I'm sorry,
but i think that's called being able to think
for yourself. Times are achanging and we're not so helpless anymore
(like we ever really were).
And then there's putting up with rumors. Who starts rumors?
Oh yeah it must be those gossipy gossipy guys. Sure. I forgot about
them whispering at the back of class about why they hate so and so
because she cheated on so and so and is not going out with
so and so. Girls can
be vicious creature too, especially when protecting their territory
from another female. Females scrutinize other females as much as any
guy possibly could, if not more. So hey, if your ex boyfriend likes
me I'm obviously some kind of slut/bitch, if I have short hair
I'm obviously a lesbian, if I'm nice to you obviously I want something
from you. We are constantly bombarded by some
perfect image of some super model. Yeah well, if I lived on
cigarettes and diet pepsi I'd be skinny too. Something I don't understand
some girls say "I wish i looked like kate moss" but you
never hear them say "I wish i was anorexic". Hey, think about
it, that's basically what you're saying. Ponder that one the next time you're
What's up with the ideal image of what a female is supposed to
look like? A certain appearance is expected to be kept up.
Okay, what's wrong with me
not shaving my legs? It's annoying, and i wear pants all the time anyway,
but oh no, hairy legs are gross...on a girl. Yeah well i think hairy
chests are pretty damn gross I don't see my boyfriend whipping out the
old lady bic. But maybe I'll ask him to do that next time.
Now, what's up with calling girls sluts. Excuse me, I didn't know this
plane was going to double standard land. how come a guy can
sleep with whomever and however many girls he wants and be some kinda
hero stud, when and when a girl does this she's a slut? I'm not
condoning casual sex, but why does a girl get slapped with some
label if she has the same behavior as a guy? Why can't girls get
away with some of the shit guys get away with? Just because we're innocent
little creatures that can't think for themselves. Whoa, let's jump
in our time machines and jump back to 1950. What makes guys so fucken superior?
Okay and who's bright idea was is that girls like cat calling?
I love (love) having nasty 40 year old guys whistle at me. Being checked
out by some nasty guy is just the biggest turn on. When a man old enough
to be your father tries to pick you up that's the sign that
you've made it in this world. YEAH!
yeah we've come a long way from being little cave girls being dragged around
by our cave men. Dammit, the demure female doesn't exist anymore.
I'm more than just a female, I'm me. We don't
put up with your shit, and we demand respect. Hey after a few thousand years
of being hid away as little homemakers don't you think we deserve it?